For five years, a quiet ministry has taken root at St. Patrick Parish in Traverse City through the WOW Ministry. WOW stands for Widows or Widowers.
At the heart of this ministry stands Tom Zeoli, a longtime music minister whose attentive spirit first recognized a hidden loneliness among a group of parishioners. Yet this story is not his alone. It is the story of a parish that answered with him. It is the story of shared stewardship and the beauty of a “yes” echoed by many.
“It started when a couple of guys from the parish men’s club saw four widowers from the parish having breakfast at the local Big Boy,” Tom recalls. “During a men’s club meeting, we started to talk about doing something for the widowers.
“One January morning, one of the widowers stopped in the parish office. As he was leaving, we said nice talking to you. He replied, ‘The pleasure was all mine. I haven’t talked to a real person in a week,’” Tom remembers.
The message could not have been clearer. Tom carried it home in prayer.
“I thought: We need to do something,” he reflects. “We can invite the widows and widowers to attend Mass and then go to the social hall and be served a hot breakfast.” He continues, “After breakfast, we could have some sort of presentation or activity so that people do not go home to an empty house so quickly.”
That moment of attention became an invitation. Tom shared the idea with parish leaders and volunteers. The response was immediate and generous. What began as one man’s concern quickly became a community commitment.
From the beginning, Tom has been clear about the spirit of the gatherings. “There’s no mourning going on,” he explains. “Of course, they think about their spouse. But this is about good interaction. It’s about feeling alive.” His vision shaped the ministry, but it is sustained by many hands.
A Parish that Makes Room for Grace
Behind every breakfast stands a team. Ten to 12 volunteers shop, cook, bake and serve. They arrive early to set tables and stay late to clean up. The atmosphere is simple, welcoming and full of warmth. Coffee is poured, plates are filled and conversation slowly begins to flow across the room.
“There is no cost for the widows and widowers who attend,” Tom says. “Monies from various parish events help fund the WOW Ministry so that anyone can come and feel welcome.”
Tom’s own formation prepared him for this work. For years, he served as an accountant in nursing homes where his wife, Sandy, was an administrator. Married for 38 years, they shared a commitment to the dignity of seniors.
“It was always our business to make sure they had what they needed,” Tom reflects. “You learn what the older population needs and wants. They need dignity. They need purpose. They need someone to talk to.”
At 76, he still feels the effort of each gathering. “By noon, I am tired,” he admits. “But I feel great.”
That joy belongs not only to him. Volunteers speak of the blessing they receive. Parishion
ers laugh easily, and stories move from table to table. The room itself feels lighter as the morning continues.
Shared Stewardship Shared Hope
The gatherings follow the rhythm of northern Michigan. They pause during the winter months and resume in the spring when travel becomes easier and daylight returns.
“April is the time to come out and bloom,” Tom reflects.
Blooming is visible in tentative smiles that grow into friendships over time. The WOW Ministry is not only for St. Patrick Parish. Participants come from several parishes in the region and even a few non-Catholics who are grateful for the companionship.
One man told Tom, “I think of my wife every day.” Tom nodded with understanding.
“Of course he does,” Tom offers. “But you still need to provide something. You need a place to talk, socialize, interact and feel alive.”
In a culture that often moves quickly past grief, this parish chooses to pause. It sets tables, warms coffee and opens doors. The small gestures become quiet acts of mercy.
“Sometimes people just need an excuse to get out,” Tom observes. “A meal with someone else. A reason to put on a jacket and leave the house.”
That excuse becomes an encounter, and that encounter becomes hope.
“We all risk loss when we love,” Tom reflects. “That’s part of life. But the parish can be a place where you do not have to carry that alone.”
Through shared effort and steady faith, St. Patrick Parish embodies that promise. Lives are touched with companionship, renewed purpose and quiet joy. In the simple act of showing up together, this community reveals the beauty of stewardship. One attentive “yes” embraced by many becomes a living sign that grace is never meant to be kept but always to be given to others.
